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Abbott and Costello talk about marriage

Do you yearn for her?
Abbott and Costello talk about marriage – Taken from their radio program, Bud Abbott and Lou Costello joke about marriage – in real life, Lou Costello was a happily married man, but you can’t tell by these jokes! Lou Costello: I don’t believe in marriage, Abbott.   Marriage...
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Teller in the Bank

Teller in the Bank –  From the Abbott and Costello radio show, “Marilyn Learns to Drive” – Bud tells Lou what position his brother has in his job at the bank. A joke in the same vein as their classic “Who’s on First?” routine Lou Costello: Can you...
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I’m quite the fisherman

I’m quite the fisherman   –  Bud Abbott and Lou Costello joke about Bud being a fisherman, from the song “Laugh, Laugh, Laugh” Bud Abbott: I’m quite the fisherman, Costello? Lou Costello: What makes you a fisherman?
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Women are putty in my hands

Women are putty in my hands –  From the Abbott and Costello radio show, “Nylon Stockings” – where Bud tries to brag to Lou about his ability to handle women Bud Abbott: Leave it to me, women are putty in my hands.
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She’s penny wise

She’s penny wise –  From the Abbott and Costello radio show, “Driving Lessons with Marilyn” – Lou talks about his would-be romance with the beautiful Marilyn Maxwell Lou Costello: There’s only one problem with our romance; She’s penny wise. Bud Abbott: Marilyn’s penny wise?
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Abbott and Costello talk about horses

Bud Abbott and Lou Costello talk  about horses – a joke from Abbott and Costello’s radio show, April 28, 1948 Bud Abbott: Talk sense. What do you know about horses. Lou Costello: Abbott, I was born on a horse. Bud Abbott: How could you be born on a horse?
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Abbott and Costello meet Microsoft Windows

Abbott and Costello meet Microsoft Windows – an imaginary conversation where Abbott tries to tell Costello how to shut down Microsoft Windows (Editor’s note: the great comedy team of  Abbott and Costello  passed away before either Bud Abbott or Lou Costello could have used Microsoft Windows™—but isn’t it...
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Abbott and Costello talk about Lou’s new dog

Abbott and Costello talk about Lou’s new dog, a Christmas present from Mrs. Niles – from the Abbott and Costello radio show (From Abbott and Costello’s radio show, December 30, 1943)Lou Costello: Oh, Abbott, the worst thing just happened to me!Bud Abbott: No!Lou Costello: Yeah, Mrs. Niles gave me...
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